I woke from a dream last night that showed me how I need to trust my mother’s love more, that this will help us work together. I do not know how to say this to her, so I make a wonderful chili for her to eat, full of flavor. She helps herself to seconds, even thirds!
The hands that reach out to me are strong and sure, the voice encouraging, even if a little impatient. Caught up in her confidence, I follow my mother up the mountain, against my better judgment. I am afraid of getting lost, and being alone. In this moment, all my fears are magnified in this one possibility.
As I suspect, my brothers and cousins have gone ahead, my mother out of sight. I cry and cry, lost and alone, until she comes with soothing reassurances that she is right here.
All these years later, I must remember that she does not owe me a sense of security. She is only my mother, full of love, happy to see me every morning.
I love her humanity. I pray it helps me accept my own.